Dr. Mitch Abblett is a clinical psychologist, author, consultant and national / international speaker who is on a quest to help people authentically, compassionately and courageously connect with the true "prizes" in one another.
Hey Mitch, can you please share a few words about your transformational journey — What is the most important transformation you experienced? What ultimately led you to that transformation?
Having children has definitely been the greatest learning experience and teaching I’ve received. I thought I understood my life and the mission I had to play in it until my kids arrived and taught me about how ego was still blinding me with its constant hunger for validation. My kids have helped me learn the agendaless presence of what I call “prizing” kids. That only be learning to let go of my own reactions and agendas could I truly connect with them in the present moment. Herein lies the possibility for truly connecting, creating and impacting -- the true “prize.”
What is your definition for success? What do you personally do to attain more of it?
I think I just arrived at it in the previous answer. Success is getting so present and out of one’s own conditioning and habits of self-protection that you drop into what I call the “zero point.” This is where flow states happen and you show up to doing despite discomfort and for compassionate and other-focused ends. Success is when your doing matches your being.
What motivates you to keep going when times are difficult? Also, how do you deal with challenging thoughts or emotions?
Thoughts and emotions are natural parts of the human brain and evolved in us as a species to help us make plans, ward off threats and find food for survival. Emotions were the motivating fuel for the actions of surviving. The vast majority of thinking and emotionality is reactive and conditioned into automaticity of habit. At best, thoughts and emotions become tools that consciousness (the True Self) uses to connect, create and positively impact others. They are not who we here, now, always and ever most accurately and deeply are.
When I become lost in old survival brain habits of reactive thought and emotion I remember to OWN that these patterns are mine in the body and mind. I rest in the knowing of mindfulness and take action that gives a much better offer of connection and creative impact than the old habits of emotion and thought ever could. I don’t always immediately remember to return “home” but I’m working on it!
What is one habit or morning ritual that has benefited your life the most? Also, what is one habit you’ve always wanted to add to your life, but didn’t?
Sitting meditation for sure. I’ve always wanted to add daily, consistent journaling. While I journal most days, I’m far from consistent.
What is one belief or value that you hold as your guiding truth? Also, how do you let go of limiting beliefs when they arise?
Awareness is the only light that never dies and never lies. Limiting beliefs always whither in the light of pure awareness.
What is one of the best or most worthwhile investments —money or time investment — you’ve ever made?
The time invested in meditation practice is the best investment I have ever made in myself, my family, and my career possibilities.
What is one life-changing book that has greatly influenced and helped you along the way? Also, who has inspired you the most in your journey?
Total Freedom -- Jiddu Krishnamurti
I’ve been forever inspired by the courage of my 10 year-old daughter Celia. The light and courage of her heart is absolutely breath-taking.
What is your message to someone who's about to embark on their next big mission or dream? Also, what advice should they ignore?
Know that you are unfolding into that which is your prize. It’s not actually “yours” in a possession sort of way. It’s yours in the sense of gifted responsibility. There is no need to despair or worry since it was meant to unfold and all that is required is your patience, courage and willingness to let go into who you truly are.
Finally, what are you primarily working on these days?
I’m writing (launching my latest book -- Prizeworthy : How to Meaningfully Connect, Build Character, and Unlock the Potential of Every Child, Shambhala Publications) and I’m also starting a podcast, “The Prize of Possibility.” I’m in practice as a clinical psychologist in Boston, and doing a fair amount of talks and consulting as well. And yes … showing up as Dad as best I can!